{"id":136,"date":"2013-08-08T08:16:00","date_gmt":"2013-08-08T08:16:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/2013\/08\/08\/jak-jsem-nedostavala-balicky\/"},"modified":"2019-09-25T18:53:09","modified_gmt":"2019-09-25T18:53:09","slug":"jak-jsem-nedostavala-balicky","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/2013\/08\/08\/jak-jsem-nedostavala-balicky\/","title":{"rendered":"Jak jsem (ne)dost\u00e1vala bal\u00ed\u010dky"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
\nPokud n\u011bkdo v\u00ed l\u00e9pe ne\u017e v\u0161ichni ostatn\u00ed, kde bydl\u00edm, mus\u00ed to b\u00fdt rozhodn\u011b po\u0161\u0165\u00e1k a kur\u00fdr z PPLka, kter\u00fd si u\u017e i pamatuje, jakou pou\u017e\u00edv\u00e1m vo\u0148avku.<\/p>\n
\n<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\nSice jsem psala, \u017ee p\u0159i st\u011bhov\u00e1n\u00ed objev\u00edte, \u017ee m\u00e1te v\u00edc kr\u00e1m\u016f, ne\u017e jste se v\u016fbec odv\u00e1\u017eili si p\u0159edstavovat. Ale tak\u00e9 zjist\u00edte, \u017ee spousta pot\u0159ebn\u00fdch v\u011bc\u00ed v\u00e1m chyb\u00ed. Nap\u0159\u00edklad:<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n1. Hodinky<\/b><\/div>\n
\nP\u0159\u00edteli jste koupili hodinky za to, jak je chytr\u00fd (rozum\u011bj ud\u011blal doktor\u00e1t). Jdete si je vyzvednout na po\u0161tu. Otr\u00e1ven\u00e1 \u00fa\u0159ednice zjist\u00ed, \u017ee odes\u00edlatel nep\u0159ilo\u017eil k bal\u00ed\u010dku slo\u017eenku. Tak\u017ee p\u0159ed celou frontou znuzen\u00fdch lid\u00ed, kte\u0159\u00ed nemaj\u00ed nic lep\u0161\u00edho na pr\u00e1ci ne\u017e v\u00e1s sledovat, se bal\u00edk sna\u017e\u00edte rozbalit. P\u0159i \u0161kub\u00e1n\u00ed igelitu a izelopy p\u0159em\u00fd\u0161l\u00edte, jestli se n\u011bco podobn\u00e9ho stalo i n\u011bkomu, kdo si \u0161el na p\u0159ep\u00e1\u017eku vyzvednout erotick\u00e9 pom\u016fcky.<\/div>\n
\n
\n<\/b><\/div>\n
\n2. Objektiv<\/b><\/div>\n
\nV deset r\u00e1no na v\u00e1s zvon\u00ed po\u0161\u0165\u00e1k, a\u0165 si dol\u016f jdete vyzvednout bal\u00ed\u010dek (dlouho o\u010dek\u00e1van\u00fd objektiv). Nad\u0161en\u011b sj\u00ed\u017ed\u00edte dol\u016f, podepisujete, jak jste v\u0161e p\u0159evzali. Ve v\u00fdtahu se u\u017e u\u017e chyst\u00e1te roztrhnout ob\u00e1lku. Ale najednou si uv\u011bdomujete, \u017ee je p\u0159ece blbost, aby byl objektiv v ob\u00e1lce. Kouk\u00e1te na jm\u00e9no a adresu a zji\u0161\u0165ujete, \u017ee to nen\u00ed v\u016fbec pro v\u00e1s. Otr\u00e1ven\u011b tedy sj\u00ed\u017ed\u00edte zp\u00e1tky dol\u016f ke schr\u00e1nk\u00e1m a v t\u00e9 va\u0161\u00ed nach\u00e1z\u00edte upozorn\u011bn\u00ed, \u017ee jste nebyli doma a a\u0165 si pro bal\u00edk ve\u010der zajdete na po\u0161tu.<\/div>\n
\nDo schr\u00e1nky sousedky, jej\u00ed\u017e bal\u00ed\u010dek nyn\u00ed vlastn\u00edte, vhazujete tajemn\u00fd vzkaz: “M\u00e1m v\u00e1\u0161 bal\u00edk. P\u0159ij\u010fte si pro n\u011bj do dev\u00edtky.” Zn\u00ed to z\u0159ejm\u011b trochu v\u00fdhru\u017en\u011b, proto\u017ee sousedka se k v\u00e1m odv\u00e1\u017e\u00ed p\u0159ij\u00edt a\u017e po sedmi dnech.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n3. Z\u00e1clony<\/b><\/div>\n
\nZ\u00e1kladn\u00ed k\u00e1men \u00farazu: p\u0159esn\u011b v\u00edte, jak maj\u00ed z\u00e1clony do bytu vypadat. Co\u017e znamen\u00e1, \u017ee je nikde nem\u016f\u017eete sehnat. Odhodl\u00e1te se a objedn\u00e1te je p\u0159es internet. Nejd\u0159\u00edv vyberete \u0161patnou d\u00e9lku, tak\u017ee objedn\u00e1vku po emailech m\u011bn\u00edte. Pak odjedete na vodu a email s t\u00edm, \u017ee dodavatel omylem poslal jin\u00e9 rozm\u011bry z\u00e1clon, si p\u0159e\u010dtete, a\u017e kdy\u017e u\u017e je pozd\u011b.<\/div>\n
\nM\u00edsto z\u00e1clon do \u010dty\u0159 pokoj\u016f v\u00e1m doraz\u00ed jen dvoje … a ut\u011brka. <\/div>\n
\nNa zbytek \u010dek\u00e1te dal\u0161\u00ed m\u011bs\u00edc.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n4. Gau\u010d<\/b><\/div>\n
\nVe \u010dtvrtek v\u00e1m m\u00e1 dorazit gau\u010d do ateli\u00e9ru. Ve st\u0159edu dopoledne, kdy\u017e jste jedin\u00fd den z cel\u00e9ho t\u00fddne doma sami, v\u00e1m vol\u00e1 kur\u00fdr z PPLka a oznamuje, \u017ee do deseti minut je u v\u00e1s s n\u011bjak\u00fdm velk\u00fdm bal\u00edkem.<\/div>\n
\nNa kole\u010dk\u00e1ch v\u00e1m tu neskladnou, rozm\u011brnou kr\u00e1vu doveze za prvn\u00ed uzamykateln\u00e9 dve\u0159e. Vy pak str\u00e1v\u00edte velice zaj\u00edmav\u00fdch t\u0159icet minut t\u00edm, \u017ee se gau\u010d sna\u017e\u00edte vyrvat do schod\u016f a naskl\u00e1dat ho do v\u00fdtahu. P\u0159i tom zjist\u00edte, \u017ee v dom\u011b nem\u00e1te \u017e\u00e1dn\u00e9 svalnat\u00e9 sousedy, kte\u0159\u00ed by v\u00e1m s t\u00edm pomohli, jen sam\u00e9 k\u0159ehk\u00e9 babi\u010dky, kter\u00fdm t\u00e1hne na devades\u00e1t.<\/p>\n

Zdroj fotky: WiseGeek <\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Pokud n\u011bkdo v\u00ed l\u00e9pe ne\u017e v\u0161ichni ostatn\u00ed, kde bydl\u00edm, mus\u00ed to b\u00fdt rozhodn\u011b po\u0161\u0165\u00e1k a kur\u00fdr z PPLka, kter\u00fd si u\u017e i pamatuje, jakou pou\u017e\u00edv\u00e1m vo\u0148avku. Sice jsem psala, \u017ee p\u0159i st\u011bhov\u00e1n\u00ed objev\u00edte, \u017ee m\u00e1te v\u00edc kr\u00e1m\u016f, ne\u017e jste se v\u016fbec odv\u00e1\u017eili si p\u0159edstavovat. Ale tak\u00e9 zjist\u00edte, \u017ee spousta pot\u0159ebn\u00fdch v\u011bc\u00ed v\u00e1m chyb\u00ed. Nap\u0159\u00edklad: 1.…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[327],"tags":[245,246,26,211,247,145],"class_list":["post-136","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-jak-jsem-si-uzivala","tag-balicky","tag-ceska-posta","tag-jak-jsem","tag-kovbojka","tag-ppl","tag-stehovani"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/136","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=136"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/136\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":990,"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/136\/revisions\/990"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=136"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=136"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nevsedni-vsednosti.cz\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=136"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}